If you want to stay friends with her, don’t lead her on or wait too long to tell her that you don’t have romantic feelings for her. If you think she might like you as more than just a friend, but you aren’t sure, try asking one of her friends about it.
If you really can’t meet up with her in person, try setting up a video chat or at least a phone call so she can hear your voice.
You could lead with something nice and then deliver the news like, “I think you’re really nice, but I just don’t see us being together. ” You could also give a clear and direct no and say something like, “I’m not interested in a relationship right now. ”
For example, you could say, “I don’t want a relationship” instead of something like, “I’m not interested in you. ”
You could try being apologetic so she understands that you don’t enjoy hurting her feelings, but you also didn’t want to lead her on. For instance, you could say something like, “I’m really sorry I just feel the same way, but I hope that we can still be friends. ”
For instance, you could say something like, “You’re good friends with my ex and I just don’t feel comfortable with it” or “I don’t think we share common interests. ” The truth doesn’t have to be harsh. Instead of saying something like, “I just don’t like you,” you could say, “I just don’t think we’re compatible. ”
For example, after you tell her that you don’t have romantic feelings for her, you could say something like, “I really treasure the friendship we have and I feel like a romantic relationship could ruin that. ” If she’s really upset and wants you to leave her alone, don’t try to crack a joke or be funny.
Try saying something like, “I know this sucks, but I hope we can still hang out. I really appreciate our friendship, but I understand if you need some time. ” It may be awkward for a bit, but eventually, things may go back to normal and you can spend time around each other without it being weird.
For instance, if you’re both fans of the TV show The Office, you could quote a line from the show like, “I am ready to be hurt again” or “Oh how the turntables. ” If she’s really upset, it may be best for you to give her some time and space.
Keep in mind she may not be comfortable being around you. If that’s the case, respect her wishes and give her space.
If she’s uncomfortable being around you, don’t force the issue. Give her the space she needs.
For instance, you text her something like, “Hey, I had a great time, but I don’t think there’s a connection here,” or “Hi! Thanks for dinner, but I don’t think there’s a lot of chemistry between us. ”
Ghosting her can make you seem like a jerk, especially if you have mutual friends.
