You might say, “Hey, I’m not sure if you know or not, but I really am head over heels for you. You mean a lot to me, and I really cherish our relationship…”

You could tell them, “Look, I’m not sure if you feel the same way, and I’d like you to tell me if you feel differently, but I feel like we’ve got something really good here. I could totally see us moving in together after college…”

You may say, “Just so you know, I would want to stay together even if you live in Denver and I live here in Las Vegas. I know it might be tough, but I think you’re worth it and I’m not ready to give up on us…. ” If your partner is on the fence about this because they don’t want to do the vulnerable thing and put their neck out there (just in case you don’t want to be long-distance), this should put an end to that.

You might point out, “You’re going to be super busy with college-level coursework, and it takes time to make new friends. Maybe it’ll be good to have that free time for yourself…”

You can say, “I’m scared to move to a new place where I don’t know anyone, and I can’t imagine it’s any different for you. We’ll be able to lean on each other for support. . . ” If you’re the one moving, you might explain that you’d appreciate them supporting you while you move.

You could point out, “It’s not like long-distance relationships aren’t real relationships. We’d still love each other, we’d still talk all the time, and we can see each other every other weekend. A lot of people do long-distance and they’re perfectly happy…”

You might say, “If you’re worried about not getting to see one another, we can video chat every day if that’s what you want! We can also write emails, and chat online all day. It’ll be like I’m not even gone. . . ”

Even if they do say yes when you’re pushing them, they may just be giving in to the pressure. For a long-distance relationship to work, both partners need to be on the same page. You have to let them come to the right conclusion on their own.

If they’re worried about never seeing you because they won’t have a car, you might agree to drive to them every other weekend so you can hang out together. If they’re concerned you won’t stay committed, reaffirm your relationship and shower your partner with love. They may just want to know you’re seriously in love with them and that you aren’t going anywhere. If they’re worried about losing the romance, you two might agree to plan a romantic weekend trip once every couple of months, or promise to “surprise” one another at least once a month. If they don’t know if they’ll be able to take the distance, remind them that you’ll only ever be one phone call, video call, or text away.

Are you required to check in once every 1-3 days? What about a dedicated “date” night where you two do something online together? How often are you going to see one another? Who is going to come to who? Are you allowed to date other people while you’re apart? If so, is it a “don’t ask, don’t tell” situation?

Most long-distance couples do not choose to talk every single day, since that can be a bit much. If you want to start with that and see how you feel though, that’s totally fine!

A large component of this is how far you two are going to be from one another. If you’re in California and they’re in New York, you might shoot for once every 3 months. If you’re in Chicago and they’re in Detroit, every weekend might be viable! If it’s possible, try to alternate between you and your partner when it comes to traveling. It can be difficult for one partner to feel like they’re doing all of the heavy lifting when it comes to in-person meetings.

If you’re both going to college, you might suggest getting back together once you both graduate, or talk about transferring after the first 2 years. If it’s a work-related thing, you might discuss looking for new work wherever your partner lives once they establish themselves.

It may be hard now, but there’s no reason the two of you can’t reconnect in the future. This kind of “practical” breakup can hurt even more since nothing was really wrong, but that also means there’s a good chance you two will reconnect in the future.