For example, maybe you aren’t comfortable with him meeting up with his ex. You might say something like, “I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t meet up with Alex one-on-one. I understand if you see your ex in a group of friends, though. ” Or, maybe you’d like to know who he’s hanging out with ahead of time. You could say, “Would you mind letting me know who you’re meeting up with? It would just make me feel better. ”
This can be hard to do, especially if your boyfriend messed up big time (like cheating on you). However, it’s the best way to move forward and improve your relationship.
Try not to guilt-trip him or make him feel bad for going out, either. You’re both allowed to have friends outside of your relationship.
Think about how much fun you have with friends and how little you look at your phone when you’re out. The same is true for your boyfriend.
Going through your BF’s devices to convince yourself he’s trustworthy only harms you, because you’re letting your anxious thoughts take over. Instead, challenge those thoughts and remind yourself that you don’t have any evidence to support your worries.
Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. If he can trust you, then you’re halfway there.
Try telling him something that you’ve never told anyone else, or share an embarrassing moment that makes you cringe.
For instance, maybe you think something like, “My boyfriend is probably out talking to other girls right now. ” You might think to yourself, “What evidence do I have that this is true?” Or, maybe you think, “I wonder if he’s messaging guys on Instagram. ” You might ask yourself, “Is this a valid thought? Why do I feel this way?”
You could try having a picnic in the park, going for a long walk around the neighborhood, trying a new restaurant, or taking a hobby class together.
If you and your boyfriend are really serious, you might also want to consider seeing a couple’s counselor together.
Think back on all the ways your boyfriend has been trustworthy in the past. Try to use these memories as a reminder any time you start assuming that he’s being untrustworthy.
