“You mean a lot to me. ” If you’re very close: “I love you. ”
“How can I best support you right now?” “Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to make things easier for you. ”
“Tell me more about how you’re feeling, if you’re up to it. ” “I’d like to talk through this with you, if you want. ”
“I know this experience must be really painful for you. ” “I’m sorry you’re going through this. "
“Thank you for feeling comfortable enough to tell me this. It really means a lot. ” “Being open about depression can be hard. I’m honored that you shared this with me. "
“Depression isn’t anything to be ashamed of—many people experience it and recover. You won’t have to deal with this forever. ” “I know it can be hard to have hope some days, but you won’t feel like this forever, even if it feels that way sometimes. ” A gentle reminder that depression isn’t permanent is enough. Be careful about giving someone with depression too many opinions about how they can make things better. In most cases, they just want someone to listen to them. [7] X Research source
“You’re not a weak person for having depression. You’re strong for being able to struggle with these feelings, and I want to be here for you while you do it. ” Avoid saying things like “Stay positive” or “Snap out of it. ” Responses like that can be very painful for someone with depression to hear. The causes of depression are still being studied, but psychologists agree that it’s a combination of genetic, biological, environmental, and psychological factors. In other words, it’s not a choice to be depressed. [9] X Trustworthy Source National Institute of Mental Health Informational website from U. S. government focused on the understanding and treatment of mental illness. Go to source
You might say, “I remember those feelings of depression really well. It felt impossible for me to ever get out of bed, and I would just start crying at the most random times. ” If you haven’t struggled with diagnosed depression, don’t try to relate to your friend’s experience. Depression goes beyond normal sadness. You can be a better source of support by just listening.
If the conversation is too tough, doing something like watching a movie or TV, taking a walk, or listening to music together can help your friend feel less alone. [12] X Research source
“Maybe we could go to the beach next week. ” “Let’s go watch a movie on Thursday. ”
Helping your friend with small tasks can be helpful, but try not to do everything for them since that can make them feel helpless. It’s important for someone with depression to do things for themselves so they can feel empowered. [16] X Trustworthy Source Mind U. K. -based mental health charity focused on providing advice and resources to anyone facing mental health problems. Go to source
If your friend says yes, please get in touch with their close friends and family immediately. If you can reach their doctor or a mental health professional, do so. Keeping your friend’s experiences confidential is important, but this situation is too serious to not seek help. [18] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source You can also find support and guidance with the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. Contact 988 by calling or texting to speak with a trained counselor. [19] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source
“I know you’re going through a lot now, but I really think talking to a professional can help you sort out your feelings. Can I help you find an appointment?” Helping your friend get treatment by offering transportation to their appointments or help finding a therapist can be really invaluable. Try your best to help your friend stay on track with their treatment plan when they get one by checking-in on them once in a while. [21] X Trustworthy Source National Alliance on Mental Illness Grassroots mental health-focused organization providing resources, support, and education for those affected by mental illness Go to source
