If you’ve kept your feelings a secret, you may not be able to just let your crush know that you no longer want to speak. But remember, your feelings come first. It’s okay to make up an excuse if that makes things easier for you: “I’ve been so busy with work lately. I don’t think I’ll be able to chat much for a while. . . " Or if it makes sense in your situation, tell them directly: “I don’t think I can be in touch with you. It makes me feel sad, and I have to prioritize my feelings. " By continuing to talk with your crush, you risk leaving the wound open. By shifting your focus from this person, you’ll fill your life with new promise.
You may end up combing through their every last photo. Or, you may be caught off guard by a pic of them at the beach. Either way, you deserve better. If you haven’t expressed feelings or don’t want this person to know, mute them. This will silence their posts, but they’ll have no way of knowing. Remember, social media breaks can boost your mood. If you can’t resist their page, take hiatus from social media. Shift your focus while improving your mental health.
If you’re not sure about who to reach out to, join an online support group for people who recently suffered a breakup. Even if you two didn’t date, your feelings are real, valid, and challenging. Discussing them with people who are experiencing the same could be healing. Who knows, by offering your own experiences and empathetic ear, you could help someone else process their feelings, too.
Pick up a new skill you’ve been wanting to try. Woodworking, ballroom dancing, or volunteering with wikiHow—if it interests you, it’s a perfect choice. Double the amount of time you spend doing your favorite things. This might be exercise, a cooking class, or building your dream closet. Choose activities that will grow you professionally or personally. Learn to code, design a website, or finally pull together your portfolio. Creative outlets can ease the pain of heartbreak, too. Make a heartbreak playlist or write a short story about your feelings.
If you notice someone cute making eyes at a coffee shop, consider walking over and leaving your number. Why not? If you feel comfortable, sign up for a dating app. If the thought of creating your profile sounds bad enough to discourage you, enlist a friend for help. Don’t let reminiscing keep you from something great. You deserve more than old memories tinged with sadness—you deserve love. So, go out and get it!
If you think you’ll want a copy of any texts or photos, save them to a flash drive but delete them off of your phone. This way, you’ll be able to return to the memories when your heart has healed. But still, they won’t be easy to access on an impulse.
Your crush wasn’t your ultimate dreamboat. Your first list is filled with qualities you didn’t like. The second, dream qualities this person didn’t have. Most of all, you deserve someone who puts you first. The dream partner you’ve described in your second list would definitely do that for you! Remind yourself that it’s a big world out there. Go find someone who looks more like list #2.
Journal about ten things you’re great at, ten things you’ve accomplished, and ten things you think you’d be good at. Spend five minutes on each. Recite positive affirmations that are meaningful to you: “I’m smart, worthy, and capable. ” Do this daily while smiling at your mirror’s reflection. Select one big goal, like finding a new job. Come up with three sub-goals that’ll help you get there, like “edit my resume. " Post these goals on your bulletin board.
Go for a walk at sunset. Eat mint chocolate chip ice cream and watch The Bachelor. Listen to your favorite Taylor Swift album from start to finish. Grab a weighted blanket and take a nice, long nap. Light a sweet-smelling candle and solve the Sunday crossword puzzle.
Can you really be heartbroken over someone you didn’t date? Yes, it happens all the time. Your relationship status doesn’t determine your pain. I can’t go to my friends for help, because it’s silly that I’m heartbroken. Your friends love you. And you deserve to feel supported while handling heartbreak. I never even told this person how I felt. That was stupid. You did what you thought was best at the time. Besides, it’s never too late to share how you feel. I always fall for unavailable people. What’s my problem? The truth is, everybody has a romantic pattern or two to break. The fact that you recognize yours is so powerful. Think of how exciting it’ll be when you finally break the habit!
Reach out to your funniest friends. Anyone who makes you feel amazing and stress-free is perfect company. Do something silly together, like an improv class. Watch and listen to hilarious content. If you’re watching a movie, make it a comedy. If you need a soundtrack for a nice long walk, go for a funny podcast. Even alone, be silly. Dance to pop music while you cook dinner. Make funny faces in the mirror while getting ready. Look for the humor in routine situations.
Resist comparing your heartbreak process to anyone else. Everyone is different. And oftentimes, people act “fine” before they actually are.
Consistent sad or empty moods Feelings of hopelessness, guilt, or helplessness Low energy Issues sleeping Irritability
