Maybe on the way to ice cream, you hear a street performer with a killer voice. If your date seems into it, don’t be afraid to stop and listen. A great date is more about having fun and connecting than about hitting every activity on a checklist.
Stay in the moment be really listening to what your date is saying. Nod your head, ask informed questions, and validate their feelings when you can. [6] X Expert Source Lisa ShieldDating Coach Expert Interview. 13 December 2018. You should totally be able to share your own stuff too, but to knock the first date out of the park, let the other person have the floor as much as they want it. Try not to change topics too much during your conversation. You don’t want it to feel like a job interview![7] X Expert Source Lisa ShieldDating Coach Expert Interview. 13 December 2018.
“This shrimp is amazing! I’m actually so impressed. This place is delicious. ” “I love your watch, where did you get it?” “I love LA. In my opinion, this is the most magical city in the world. What do you think?”
Try being positive, but real. “I’m glad I made it this far in my career, but it was tough. I had a really hard time keeping up for a long time. ” Be honest about your hobbies. “I love higher-quality movies and books, but I’m not going to lie. I’ve also seen every episode of Love Island and The Bachelor. ”
“Wow, it sounds like you and your niece are really close. What do you two normally love to do together?” “I can’t imagine how rewarding it would be to be a teacher. What’s your favorite part and what’s the most challenging?” “I’ve only read a little bit of Tolstoy and Chekhov. What do I absolutely need to read next?”
“I’m a vegetarian, too! At first it was for the environment, but now I’ve realized it just makes me feel better. Why’d you start?” “I would go to Bend every year with my family. It’s my favorite place in the world. Do you think you’ll ever move to that area?” “Right, it’s so hard but so rewarding. I do think I want to move back by my family at some point, though. What about you?”
“Let me know if you get sleepy or something. I love hanging out with you, but I can totally get you a ride home if you need it. ” You can add to your date’s confidence by throwing them a thoughtful compliment. “You have such a nice voice. I love listening to you speak. ” A second date will be way more likely to happen if your date felt great the first go-round—and you can make sure that happens!
If the two of you are walking through a park together, why not ask for a quick race to the next tree? If the restaurant you planned to eat at closes early, turn the that into something fun. “First person to get us a new table gets their dessert paid for!” Try some creative, funny people-watching. Take turns going back and forth, making up nearby strangers’ relationships and conversations.
If you need to use your phone, head for a bathroom break first. This way, you can respond to an email without making your date feeling ignored. If the conversation is headed in the direction of relationships/breakups reframe your comments so they aren’t directly about your ex. Don’t say, “My ex, Rachel, made me feel totally alone when we broke up. ” Instead try, “When you break up with someone, the hardest part is feeling lonely. ”
If you’re date mentions a movie they’d like to see, ask to go with. “I actually really wanted to see Sing 2, too. Maybe I could join you?” If your date pokes fun at you for not having been to a certain restaurant, use that to your advantage, “You’ll have to show me what I’m missing. "
“Hey, I had a really great time tonight. I’d love to see you again!” Or, use a callback to something that happened earlier, “Remember when you said I had terrible taste in TV?? Well, I promise to watch three of your recommendations in exchange for the chance to see you again. "
