More personal space. In this case, you may have been a little clingy for her tastes. She may ask you to back off a bit, or stop prying into her personal life. This is common in new relationships, so don’t worry. More freedom. If the relationship is new, she may still be getting used to the adjustment. If it’s an established relationship, she may simply miss her friends or spending some time alone. A break. A formal break means that you’re putting the relationship on pause. If this happens, don’t worry. A break is not a breakup in most cases. It typically just means she needs time to process her feelings and figure out what she wants. [3] X Research source
If she has the courage to tell you she wants a little room to do her own thing, she’d have the courage to say she wants to see other people or split up. Remember, no amount of pressure, complaining, or wooing is going to change her mind. The best thing you can do at this point is honor her request, even if it sounds a little painful right now. Things will get better.
If she said she still wants to talk or hang out but she just wants more room to do her own thing, it’s totally fine to stay in contact. Just don’t pester her with invasive questions or complain about her hanging out with other people. That’s only going to drive her away.
If she has asked you to stop prying into her personal life, just keep things light. Stay away from investigative questions about who she’s hanging out with or what she’s doing. If she wants more time to do things on her own, celebrate it. Encourage her to go out with her friends and have fun.
If you don’t know how to spend your sudden influx of free time, now is the perfect time to pick up a new hobby! If you aren’t on a no-contact break, there’s nothing wrong with inviting her along or telling her about the things you’re doing in your spare time. If you sit around worrying about what she’s doing or feeling bad that she isn’t here, no good is going to come of it. Not only is it healthy to pursue things you care about, but it’s a great way to keep your mind from going to a negative place.
This is a great time to reconnect with old friends you haven’t had time for while you were spending all of your time with your partner. If you’re on a break and the two of you are no longer going steady, she may want to date other people. If this is the case, try going on a date or two of your own! Companionship is always healthy, especially if you’re dealing with a painful pause on your relationship right now.
Now is a great opportunity to update your wardrobe, clean your home, and get a haircut. If she wants space to think about whether she wants to commit to you or not, there’s no better way to push her in the right direction than to improve your confidence.
Wait for her to make the first move when it comes to the relationship talk. She’ll revisit the state of your relationship when she’s ready. It’s perfectly fine to be flirty or remind her that you care about her, but don’t throw a ton of “I miss you” or “I love you so much” texts at her. Unless she wanted space because she thought you didn’t care about her, this is only going to make her feel pressured.
If you do reconnect and you ever discuss what the break was like for both of you, you could show her the letters to really demonstrate how you feel. You don’t have to do anything with the letters. You can always throw them out if you find them embarrassing or you’ve written something negative. It’s still a productive exercise either way.
If you’re feeling down, seeing a bunch of photos or status updates about how well other people are doing isn’t going to do any good either.
Avoid repeating any mistakes you made before. If she wanted more attention, give it to her. If she wanted more time to hang out with her friends, let her. Whatever it was, just do your best to be a great partner for her. Grand gestures of devotion are great in the movies, but they can backfire if you overdo it just as the two of you are getting back into the swing of things.
It can take time to find the person who is right for you. If this relationship doesn’t work out, remember that there are always more fish in the sea. It probably isn’t what you want to hear right now, but it’s true. Don’t let her string you along. If she acts like you’re her entire world one day and then turns around and gives you the cold shoulder on the next, stand up for yourself. If she isn’t ready to commit, that’s on her.
