If you enjoy biking, try some bike trails in your area or join a cycling club. Perhaps you like to play the drums. Practice each week and consider starting a band! It’s okay to share interests with your boyfriend, but remember to focus on the ones you don’t have in common, too. It’s healthy for you and your boyfriend to have separate interests.
Keep working towards that promotion at work. If you’re not super satisfied with your career, consider taking classes or switching career paths. It’s never too late to follow your dreams. Try your best not to make yourself small or pass up on opportunities for your boyfriend’s sake. If he’s a healthy, supportive partner, he will be happy for you.
Grab lunch with your friends, visit your family if they live in the area, and call up friends and family that live out of town. Avoid rescheduling or canceling your plans to accommodate your boyfriend. If he asks you to hang out while you’re out with a friend, tell him that you’re busy and give him an alternate time.
Try going to a movie at a local theater by yourself. Order some popcorn and a soda and make an evening out of it. Spend the day reading at a local park or coffee shop.
“I totally understand that you like keeping our apartment a certain way, but I’d love to add my decorations to the space, too. " “I love hanging out with you every day, but I think I need to spend the day to myself. "
When your boyfriend is out, make your own plans instead of waiting by the phone. It’ll be easier to be away from him if you’ve got something to do as well. Keep your texting to a minimum when he’s out with his friends and family. Sending him more than 1-2 texts might make him feel like you don’t trust him or respect his space.
Next time you’re feeling jealous, write down your thoughts in a journal or call up a friend. This can help you process your feelings and gain some perspective. You might find that you actually have no reason to feel this way! If your boyfriend is doing something that makes you uncomfortable, address the situation honestly and respectfully. Sometimes, jealousy means that your boyfriend crossed a boundary, and it’s necessary to speak up. You might say, “I understand that you and Sandra are good friends, but it makes me a little uncomfortable that you’ve been texting so much at night. "
Resist the urge to respond to your boyfriend immediately 100% of the time. It’s okay to wait a few hours to respond if you’re busy. If it’s taking your boyfriend longer to respond than usual, don’t fret. He may just be busy! Put your phone away and do something else for a healthy distraction.
Get plenty of rest each night, eat a healthy and well-balanced diet, and exercise regularly. If you catch yourself feeling a little clingy, try not to beat yourself up over it. Acknowledge how you feel, forgive yourself, and make positive changes going forward.
Write down a list of qualities that you like about yourself and read over that list anytime you’re feeling down Replace negative thoughts about yourself with something positive. If you catch yourself thinking something like “I never do anything right,” replace that thought with, “I’m trying my best. " Repeat a mantra like “I’m beautiful, smart, and fun to be around” or “I love myself. " Maintain confident body language by keeping your shoulders back and your head held high. Remember that confidence is a journey. When you slip up, forgive yourself and keep trying.
If you grew up with a distant parent, for example, you may struggle to feel secure in your relationships as an adult. Having a history of traumatic or abusive relationships might make you feel more vulnerable in romantic relationships as well.
