Try something like, “I really don’t like it when you do that. It makes me uncomfortable, and I want you to stop it. ”
For instance, maybe you’re okay with your boyfriend grabbing your butt in private, but not in public. Or, maybe you’re okay with him touching your butt, but you’d like him to ask you first.
If your boyfriend doesn’t respect your needs, he is not a good partner, and it’s probably time to end things with him.
If you aren’t sure whether or not your boyfriend is in a good place to talk, try asking, “Hey, do you have a second to chat with me?”
Instead of saying, “You always grab my butt in public,” try, “When you grab me in public, I feel uncomfortable. ” Instead of saying, “You only ever talk about my butt,” try, “When you compliment my butt and not the rest of my body, I feel like you’re sexualizing me. ”
“It’s totally fine if you grab my butt when we’re home alone. I don’t mind it in private. ” “You can take pictures of my butt if you keep them to yourself. ”
Say something like, “If you don’t respect my boundaries, I think it might be best if we took a break. ” Or, “If you can’t respect my wishes, I’ll have to break up with you. ”
You can say things like, “I understand where you’re coming from,” and, “Could you tell me more?”
It’s important to call things out in the moment so he understands what you’re not okay with. You could say something like, “Hey, that wasn’t cool. You can’t sexualize me like that. ”
Breaking up might sound extreme, but it’s important to hold your ground and let him know that his behavior is not okay.
Ask your loved ones not to spread rumors or talk about your boyfriend behind his back. Otherwise, it could end up hurting your relationship in the long run.
