“I’m sorry you’re going through this, and I love you very much. " “I’m so sorry your baby died. How have you been feeling?”
“I know how much you loved her. I’m sorry for your loss. " “My family and I are grieving with you. You’re not alone. " “He’ll always be your son. I’m sorry he left us so soon. "
“I can’t imagine what you’re going through. " “I don’t know what to say right now, but I’ll do whatever you need. " “I’m lost for words, but you’ll always have a shoulder when you need it. "
“My heart goes out to you. What can I do?” “Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to help. " Be aware that people in mourning might refuse your help. Accept this gracefully, without insisting. There will be chances to offer help in the future that they may take you up on. [4] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
“Let me do your chores around the house for now. You have enough on your plate. " “I’d be happy to bring you dinner this week. Is there anything specific I can make?” “Can I buy you lunch or take you to a movie? We can do something you enjoy. "
“I love that name. It’s a special name for a special child. " “Let me know if you ever don’t want me to say his name. I’ll adjust to your comfort levels. " It’s still a good idea to check with the parents and ask if they’re okay with you using the baby’s name, rather than assuming you know how they feel.
“You can tell me anything, no matter how painful. I’ll listen. " “If you want to talk about your baby, I’m more than willing to listen. "
“How are you? I don’t expect you to bounce back right away; I just want you to know I care. " “I know next week is your baby’s birthday. Do you need anything?” “You don’t have to reply if you don’t want to, but how have you been? I was just thinking of you the other day. "
“Is there something you want to do to remember your baby? I’m happy to help make it happen. " “Is there an organization I can support in your baby’s name?” “A community walk would be a great way to remember her together. Would you like help to organize it?” Be careful about inserting yourself into the celebration, as the parents may want to celebrate privately. However, depending on your relationship, they may appreciate your participation.
“Give yourself time to heal. You deserve it. " “Take care of yourself and take your time. I’ll be waiting if you ever need anything. " “It’s okay to be not okay. You deserve to grieve at your own pace. "
For example, saying “You can always have another baby” to a mother disregards her feelings about the baby she lost. Rather, try “Nobody can replace him, but I hope you get the chance to try again when you’re ready. " Other statements to avoid include “Maybe it’s for the best,” “You’ll get over it eventually,” and “Everything happens for a reason. "
