Plus, replying too quickly can make it seem like you were sitting by the phone waiting for them to reach out.
Try to think about how your ex might be feeling, too. For instance, if you two just broke up a few weeks ago and your ex hasn’t moved on yet, they might want to get back together. But, if it’s been months and your ex is in a new relationship, they might just be feeling nostalgic.
“Hey! I’m so glad you reached out. I wanted to ask you for some advice. ” “I was just going to message you! How have you been?” You can be polite and stay in contact with your ex while still making it clear that you’re not interested. [4] X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating Coach Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.
“It’s good to hear from you. Can I ask why you reached out?” “How come you decided to text me now? It’s been so long since we last talked. ”
“I’m interested to hear what you think about our breakup. Maybe it will give us both some closure. ” “I’m open to chatting with you, but I’m not sure if I’ve forgiven you yet. The breakup was really hard for me. ”
This is especially true if you have another partner. You don’t want to give your ex hope and hurt your new significant other in the process.
Sometimes, exes will try to worm their way back into your life when they see you thriving. If you’re doing super well and your ex isn’t, they might be reaching out because they regret breaking things off with you. You might also want to ignore their message if you’re dating someone new. Responding to an ex can be hurtful to a new partner, which is the last thing you want if your relationship is going well.
It can be a shock to get a random text or phone call from your ex. Although your mind might be racing, don’t assume you know what they want until they tell you.
“Hey, it’s nice to hear from you again. Wanna grab coffee this week?” “I’m glad you texted me. I have something I wanna talk to you about. Can you come over soon?”
These push-pull relationships can really take a toll on your mental health. The constant questioning and worry about your relationship rarely leads to a healthy, beneficial partnership.
Definitely don’t respond to any “You up?” texts, since that could mean your ex is looking for a booty call.