As your friend talks, say things like, “I’m sorry to hear that,” and, “Can you tell me more?” so they know you’re listening.
When they talk negatively about their marriage, try to stick to neutral statements, like, “That sounds really hard,” and, “I’m really sorry you’re going through that right now. ”
“Are you okay? That sounds really tough. I’m always here to talk if you need me. ” “Do you need any help this week? It sounds like you’re going through a lot. ”
If you really aren’t sure what your friend needs right now, feel free to ask. Say something like, “Are you just venting, or do you want some advice?” Remember—it’s okay if you can’t “fix” the problem! A lot of times, people just want to be heard. [7] X Expert Source Michael Dickerson, PsyDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 3 August 2021.
“We all deserve to be in relationships that make us feel good. I’m sorry that yours isn’t that way right now. ” “You really don’t deserve to be in a marriage that makes you feel so awful. ”
You might say things like, “One thing I’ve always liked about you is that…” or, “I admire how you always…”
“I get scared thinking about what might happen to you. ” “I feel so sad when you share things like this. ” “I’m worried about your mental health. ”
You could say something like, “I’m always here for you no matter what. You know that, right?”
Even if you can’t meet up in-person, a text convo or a short phone call are still great ways to stay in touch.
In the U. S. , you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE.